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SMS & SHAYARIS

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1.       If you need a friend and there are hundred steps between us. U just take the first step to get near me and I will take all 99 steps to be there for you.

 

2.       A B C D E F G H IJ

A - U r Attractive

B - U r Best

C - U r cute

D - U rdear 2 me

E - U r Excelent

F - U r Funny

G - U r good looking

H - He he he

I - I am

J – Joking

 

3.       hi mere B-complex.lagtahey tere dose thora kam padgaya hai. dekho na mera sarir to dinper din ghat ta chala jaraha hai. please thora dose badhaona.

 

4.       life is a book. we all read it. love is blessing we all need it. always be happy always have a smile coz, remember, in this world we are just for a while.

 

5.       if you drink alcohol you'll die 10 years early. if you smoke you'll die 5 years early. if you love someone you'll die daily.

 

6.       Forgeting you is hard to do, Forgeting me is up to you, Forget me not. Forget You never, Forget this text, But not the sender.

 

7.       1+1=2 eyes look at you 3+3=6 senses i'm feeling you 12+12=24 hours i'm thingking about you 3+4=7 days in week i'm missing you 6+6=12 months i always need you.

 

8.       tere sms to asprin hai. Please ek sms bhejona bahut headache ho rahahai.

 

9.       with the purity of heart of the people when they come out of the church after prays, and early morning melodious chirping of the bird, with the depth of the sea and the vastness of the blue sky, with the intensity of the fragrance (sweetness) continued in the morning breeze, with all that together ,I love you.

 

10.   next time it rains just try to catch drops in your hand. the drops you catch is amount U missed me and the amount you don't catch is the amount i missed you

 

11.   I wanna be your vacuum cleaner Breathing in your dust, I wanna be your Ford Cortina I will never rust

 

12.   Life is a book, we all read it. love is a blessing, we all need it. always be happy ,always have a smile coz remember in this world we are just for a while

 

13.   Ak apurba kranti tumhare jeevan mein ghat sakti hai, koi rukawat nahin hai sibayae tumhare, tumhare siba na koi tumhara mitra hai na koi tumhara satru hai, ankhen band kiye pade raho to tum shatru ho apne, ankhen khol lo to tumbi mitra ho, jago! basanta rhitu dwar par dastak de rahi hai, futo! tutne do ees bij ko. tum jo honeko ho wo hokerhi jana hai, kal par mat talo, jisne kal par tala sada ke liye tala, kyun ki kal kavi nahin aayega.

 

14.   Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres

 

15.   Love rules the court, The camp, the grove, And men below, and the saints above, For love is heaven and heaven is love.

 

16.   life brings KABHI KHUSI KABHI GAM, when it ends NA TUM JANO NA HUM, so lets do MUSTI, who knows KAL HO NA HO, but whenever you need a true friend MAIN HOON NA....!

 

17.   Mobile ke rules

1. miss call karne s apno ki yaad taza reheti hai.

2. SMS karnese pyar badta hai

3. call karnese apnapan mehesus hota hai

to ab kya karoge????

 

18.   sweet people die early because the are loved by god. you are still alive because i love you more than god.

 

19.   Life without u is imposible

U r my breath.

I can't stay a second without you.

If you are not there i'm dead.

 

Excuse me! I am talking about Oxygen.

 

20.   i want you.

to be with me

in a nice resturant

to have candle light dinner

and say those sween three words to U.

 

 

"Pay the bill."

 

21.   When i call you

1 ring means i'm thining about you

2 rings means i like you

3 rings means i'm missing you

4 rings means i need you

5 rings means bewakuf phone utha

 

22.   are O Sambha, mere kitne sms mile?

bahut sare,

aur tumne kitne bheje?

ek bhi nahi!

haat thu dhikkar hai. ab tak bahut sms khaye ab goli kha . DICHOUNG.....

 

23.   Kiss is not like Nokia...Connecting People

Kiss is not like Nike..Just Do It.

Kiss is not like Pepsi..Yeh Dil Maange More

But Kiss is like Pan Parag..Ek Se Mera Kya Hoga

 

24.   A Friendship is Sweet when its NEW

Its Sweeter when its TRUE

But Its Sweetest when the friend is like U.

 

25.   happiness keeps U sweet

trails make u strong

sorrows keep u human

failure makes u humble

success makes u glowing

 

26.   every tears is sign of weakness

every silence is sign of lonliness

every smile is sign of happiness

and every sms is sign of rememberance

 

27.   i believe in angels

the kinds that hevens sends.

i am surrounded by angels but i call them my best friends....

one of them is you.

 

28.   I thought love was just a mirage of the mind,

it's an illusion, it's fake, impossible to find.

But the day I met you, I began to see,

that love is real, and exists in me.

 

29.   If you read this SMS, you love me

If you send me, you like me.

If you save it, U touch me

If you delete it, you miss me

Whatever you do, i know you love me.

 

30.   Mobile phone cause radiation and it results in brain damage! But U r safe . It only affects people with brains!

 how lucky u r!!!!!

 

31.   If u are sick i wanna be there 4 u to take care 4 u.

 if u are sad i will wipe tears away call me because if u are sad I’m just a fon call away.

if u feel alone i will be there to be wit u. if u are boring i will make u laugh. if u are cold i will be ur sun. if u wanna play i will be ther to be ur toy. i will be there 4 u plz just let me be by ur side. thats all im asking u. i love u sooo much and i promised u that i will be by ur side when ever u need me.

 

32.   morning brings hope

afternoon brings faith

evening brings love

night brings rest

 

wish you find all of them everyday

 

33.   “You are my sunshine in the mornings, my energy throughout the day, and the reason for all my dreams while I sleep.”

 

34.   If u r stressed, you'll get pimples.. if u cry,u'll get wrinkles.. So, y don't u smile & get dimples?

 

35.   If i could choose but one friend, it would be you

 

36.   News: 3 Chimps escaped from the zoo... 1 was caught watching tv... another playing football and the third one was caught reading this txt message

 

37.   I want to suck you... lick you... wanna move my tongue all over you...wanna feel you in my mouth...yep, tat's how u...eat an ice cream!

 

38.   I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either.

 

39.   Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?

A: Run like hell....she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.

 

40.   Why don't men often show their true feelings?

 Because they don't have any.

 

41.   What is the thinnest book in the world?

What Men Know About Women.

 

42.   A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. 

 

43.   Marriage is a three ring circus: an engagement ring, a wedding ring, and suffering

 

44.   How Dogs and Women are alike.....

Neither believe that silence is golden.

Neither can balance a checkbook.

Both put too much value on kissing.

 

45.   Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred.

 

46.   If you jogged backward ... would you gain weight?

 

47.   If you can't change your mind, are you sure you still have one?

 

48.   Did you ever walk into a room and and forget why you walked in? that's how dogs spend their lives.

 

49.   I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain. No pain.

 

50.   I only use de-oudourant under one arm, so I know what I would have smelled of.

 

51.   Did you hear about the idiot who walked around the world? He drowned.

 

52.   Q: Why do all Afghans carry a piece of sandpaper?

A: Because they need a map.

 

53.   Astrologer: U'll meet a young gal who wanna everything about u.

Frog: When n where?

Astrologer: Next semester in Biology lab

 

54.   Bahu: Maan ji, yeh abhi tak nahin aaye, kahin kisi dusri ladki ke saath...

Saas: Arey kalmuhi, tu hamesha ulta kyun sochti hai? Aisa bhi to ho sakta hai ki kisi truck ke neeche aa gaya ho

 

55.   Mom: Beti badi ho kar kya karogi?

Beti: Kuch nahin... Maan banungi, padhungi, shaadi karungi... aur kya?

Mom: Jo karna hai karo par zara serial order mein karna.

 

56.   Teacher to class: A for?

Class: Apple

Teacher: Jor Se Bolo

Class: Jai Mata Di

 

57.   Monday went on Tuesday 2 Wednesday and asked Thursday whether Friday has told Saturday that Sunday is a holiday. Have a Great Sunday...

 

58.   Baba ji ka mela laga hai haridwar mein. Prashad mein Recharge Coupon diye jayenge. Kisi aur ko mat batana. Ye SMS sirf chuninda bhikhariyon ko bheje ja raha hai

 

59.   Do u know similarity between Dinosaurs and Decent Girls?

Both don't exist.

 

60.   Dream makes everything possible, Hope makes everything work, Luv makes everything beautiful, Smile makes all the above... So always Brush ur Teeth

 

61.   Jab tak tu apne dil ki baat mujhe samjhayegi Meri shaadi kahin aur ho jayegi!

 

62.   Tum aa gaye ho : Noor a gaya hai, Tum aa gaye ho : Noor a gaya hai,Chalo teeno picture chalen…..

 

63.   Mein tere pyar main, Paagal hua chhaliye Iodex maliye kaam pe chaliye.

 

64.   Yeh mere aansu jinhe koi pochne wala bhi nahi Koi aanchal enhe milta to sitare hote.

 

65.   Ek aadmi apni biwi ka antim sanskar kar ke, Ghar ja raha tha ke achanak bijli, Chamki, Badal garje, Zor se barish shuru hoi, Aadmi bola lagta hai pahunch gai.

 

66.   When u feel, That nobody loves u, Nobody cares 4 u, & every 1 is ignoring you, N hating u, U should ask urself, Sala ... Chakkar kia hai

 

67.   It takes 15 trees to produce the amount of paper that we use to write one exam. Join us in promoting the noble cause of saving trees. SAY NO TO EXAMS

 

68.   Teri awaz sunne ko jab taras jata hoon, to ghisa pita cd player chala leta hoon. Teri surat ko jab taras jaata hoon, to cartoon network laga leta hoon. Waqt hona chaiye kisi ko yaad karne ke liye, bahane to apne aap hi mil jate hain

69.   Red Rose: Luv

Yelloe Rose: Friendship

White Rose: Peace

Which Rose for u?

Nima Rose. Tan ki Durgandh Dur Kare, De Taazgi

 

70.   Kabhi kabhi mere dil mein khayal aata hai, aaj nahin aaya, kaha na kabhi kabhi aata hai

 

71.   Thought for the future generation: Don't marry & make a woman happy. In fact remain a bachelor & make several women happy.

 

72.   Ek ladka ek ladki k saath baitha tha. 2nd day doosri ladki k saath dekha gaya. 3rd day koi aur ladki thi. 4th day kisi nayi ladki ke saath tha

Moral: Ladkiyan badal jaati hain, ladke nahin badaltey

 

73.   U r thousands of miles away from me, still I'm watching ur every movement on 3 difft channels: Pogo, Cartoon network & Animal planet. Thnx to media

 

74.   Santa: Tommy ne meri saari kitaab kha layi

Mother: Ohnu mere kole leke aa mein usnu saja dewan

Santa: Saja ta mein de diti, usdi kauli wala dudh mein pee gaya

 

75.   Indian Airlines slogan: A warm experience & motherly treatment... warm b'coz AC doesn't work & motherly because Air hostesses are above 50

 

76.   Who is more satisfied, a man with a million dollars, or a man with six children?

The man with six children. The man with a million dollars wants more

 

77.   A doting father used to sing his little children to sleep until he overheard the four-year-old tell the three year old, "If you pretend you're asleep, he stops."

 

78.   A French in a hotel in NY, phoned room service for some pepper.

Attendant: Black pepper or white pepper?

French: Toilette pepper!

 

79.   Manmohan Singh: We are sending Indians to the moon next year!

Bush: Wow! Howc many?

Manamohan: 25 OBC, 25 SC, 20 ST, 5 Handicapped, 5 Sports Persons, 5 Terrorist Affected, 5 Kashmiri Migrants, 9 Politicians & if possible 1 Astronnaut

 

80.   Girl's excuses: Phone mat kiya karo dear, mom hoti hai near, papa se lagta hai fear, baat nahin hoti hai clear. Isliye SMS kiya karo dear without fear n very clear

 

81.   What's the definition of a skeleton?

A striptease that went just too far...

 

82.   Naukrani: Malkin aap udaas kyon hain?

Malkin: Tumhare sahab apne office ki kisi ladki se pyaar karte hai.

Naukrani: Nahin, sahab mujhe dhokha nahin de sakte

 

83.   Train mein TT Sadhu se bola: Kahan jana hai?

Sadhu: Jahan Ram ka janam hua tha.

TT: Ticket hai?

Sadhu: Nahin

TT: Chalo

Sadhu: Kahan?

TT: Jahan Krishan ka janam hua tha.. Jail mein

 

84.   Girl: If u'll try to kiss me, main shor macha doongi.

Boy: Lekin yahan to dur-dur tak koi nahin hai.

Girl: I know but formality to karni hi padegi…

 

85.   Gud Morning... Kindly observe SILENCE for two minutes in the memory of those poor mosquitoes who died last night after sucking ur blood. Thanks

 

86.   I'd climb the highest mountain. I'd swim the ocean blue, I'd do anything my dear- Just to get away from you

 

87.   A sexy woman is like a 1000 Rupee note. U don't know how many have handled it but u still want to have it.

 

88.   When things go wrong, when sadness fills ur heart, when tears flow in ur eyes, always remember 3 things: I’m with u, U have money & Bar is open

 

89.   In a class, teacher asked: If I buy an item@ 12.75 n sell@15.25, it's loss or profit?

Pappu: Profit in rupees & loss in paise

 

90.   Some dead people went to hell & were glad after seeing the board on gate. Why?

Because it reads: NO SEATS EXCEPT FOR SC/ST/OBC

 

91.   I have started luving 'U'... I know it sounds ridiculous but I can't control my feelings 4 'U'. Some time later I'll start luving more ALPHABETS.!

 

92.   Once in a jungle all the animals were eating PAN PARAG PAN MASALA

But giraffe was not eating. Why?

Because Oonche log oonchi pasand MANIKCHAND

 

93.   1980 girls: Maan mei Jeans pehanungi

Maan : Nahin beti log kya kahengey?

2006 girls: Maan mein mini skirt pehanungi

Maan: Pehen le beti kuch to pehan le!

 

94.   At a Rly stn a gal cheked her weight-58 kg

She removed sandal-56 kg

Then removed jacket-53kg

Then dupatta-52 kg

Coins khatam.

 

95.   A baba in q behind her said- Beebe tu kam chaalu rakh, bhaan batheri hai babay kol

 

96.   Similarity between Gandhiji & Mallika?

Dono ne kapde tyag diye, ek ne desh ke liye, doosre ne Deshwasion ke liye!

 

97.   Ap ki awaz KOYAL Jaisi, Aankhain HIRAN Jaisi, Chaal MOR jaisi, Aadtain BANDAR Jaisi. Acha hota agar koi ek cheez Insanon Wali Bhi Hoti

 

98.   A woman had triplets, she named them Mat, Pat & Tat. She fed Mat from left tit, Pat from her right tit...

Moral of the story: No Tit for Tat.

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